


Epimoji Yearning

by GalaxyMoo



Category: SPOPRstuck
Genre: Other, no homo.................., you can kiss your bro it's ok..........., you can tenderly kiss it's alright..............
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-10
Updated: 2020-05-10
Packaged: 2021-03-02 23:21:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,380
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24105124
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GalaxyMoo/pseuds/GalaxyMoo
Summary: I don't have anything to say for myself I just wanted to write them kissing.
Relationships: Floosh Eemogi/Epique Weenir
Comments: 5
Kudos: 7





	Epimoji Yearning

**Author's Note:**

  * For [whichoftime](https://archiveofourown.org/users/whichoftime/gifts).



The idea of kissing Epique isn’t new to you. Throughout your friendship, all the way back to when you first became friends ages before the game, you’ve had the idea linger in the back of your mind. The intensity of it comes and goes. Recently though it’s been much much worse. For now instead of confronting it directly you decide to be nostalgic and think about missed opportunities.

The first time you wanted to kiss Epique Weenir was when he was helping you put on makeup. It was a skill he’d learned well from Raawrz. You remember lying on the bed, trying to stay still while Epique straddled you as they worked on covering your characteristic markings with grey face paint. You were going to pretend to be a purpleblood, and the two of you would later have a fun night of running around pretending to be highbloods and hitting on them for the LOLs.

In the moment though, all you could think about was how close Epique was to you. How you hoped you wouldn’t get all sweaty and ruin their makeup work. How you didn’t understand yet why you felt this way. Bisexuality was still something you were trying to ignore. But if your understanding was right, Epique wasn’t really a boy or a girl… so you thought it’d be okay. You indulged a little in looking at her face and melting from the determined, victorious smile she had from doing a good job with this clown look for you. You indulged in the idea of just leaning a bit closer to him and letting your lips meet. You liked the idea of a hand on the back of his head, grabbing his white hair and pulling him close to yourself.

But you were not brave. Epique finished your makeup and got off of you. You helped paint his green horns the normal orange of your species, covered up his equally bright green scars, and the two of you left to enjoy a night of messing with highbloods. It was a good night and you remember sharing many laughs and smiles. Still though, you regretted not kissing them then. 

The second time you wanted to kiss Epique was fleeting, but intense. You were laughing so hard that your lungs burned, and Epique was doubled over with one hand grabbing your shoulder for support. You’d narrowly escaped some angry highbloods after they figured out what you were doing. Now that the scare was over, all you two could do was laugh and laugh. You looked at Epique then, and your face burned. 

You still weren’t brave. You didn’t kiss them then either.

The third, fourth, and fifth times go quickly. Moments of looking at Epique and processing how hot- you mean handsome and/or pretty they are. The smirks and funny remarks and genuine passion that pull at your heartstrings and would make you swoon if you didn’t have better self control. (A lie, you tell yourself. You’ve definitely swooned at least once.) 

The sixth time makes you feel bad. You don’t like how easily jealous you are. Seeing Raawrz and Epique kiss so tenderly… it gave you an even worse longing. It was easy to imagine yourself in Raawrz’s place. You see them, happy in a relationship that breaks the bounds of everything you know, and you feel envious. You doubt you’ll ever have that, especially with her. 

You try to avoid hanging out with the two of them together after that.

It doesn’t last long though. You miss Raawrz. You Miss Epique. You miss the happiness from being with your friends and seeing how happy they are together. Despite the lingering jealousy you feel, it’s inspirational to see. You wish you had that with someone. 

So instead you hung out with them as much as you could before things started to go wrong everywhere else.

You don’t want to think about all those other things that went wrong. The time just before and during the game is dark and scary and makes you anxious. You think of the scar on your chest and you shudder.

However, the seventh time you wanted to kiss them was during the game. Seeing Epique vulnerable and worried for you like that as they hugged you close and said “I love you”... it hits different. You wish you had had the courage to kiss her then. You were only barely able to return the sentiment in words. You are a simple troll. When someone you love tells you these things, especially as he has his face against your chest, you shut down. The moment the hug ended you regretted not having done anything more.

You didn’t see Epique again for a long time after that. You had to go back to LOGAG. Then everything terrible happened at once.

...You wish you didn’t hurt him. You wish you didn’t hurt any of them. But especially him. They’re the one troll who wasn’t involved in any of that mess, yet still had to deal with the pain from it.

It’s peaceful again though, and the meteor trip is almost over. You’ve been able to apologize to Epique for what happened during the game and much of this trip, and now you’re right back to being besties. It’s easier to recover when you missed each other so much.

It is now the eighth time you’ve wanted to kiss Epique.

The two of you are in what’s been designated as “the fun room” of the meteor. It’s just the common area, but with a big TV someone alchemized recently, and comfortable furniture and fairy lights that someone with better taste hasn’t been able to tear down yet. It’s silly looking, but it does its job well and everyone has been feeling better slowly. It’s a shred of normalcy after the nightmare of the game and most of this trip. Sometimes all a troll needs is a dorky common area, and things can start to get better. It makes the last few months of this more bearable.

You were playing videogames with her, but now you’re both quiet as you watch the credits roll. Epique leans against you subtly. It’s not much, and Epique could plausibly deny it if they chose to, but you still notice and it’s all you can think about.

When you look at Epique right now you know what you feel is love. Epique is a bastard and competitive and hilarious and confident and, to you at least, one of the most striking trolls you’ve ever seen. You know personally just how much they love their friends. How much they love you. That moment on LOLAL repeats in your brain constantly. When things were dark and it felt like nobody cared anymore, you could think about what Epique had said to you then and feel better knowing they love you.

This mutual crushing is a nightmare you’ve decided.

You’ve both known since the hug on LOLAL that the feeling is mutual. Yet you haven’t done anything about it. Neither of you have been quite brave enough to take the initiative and start that conversation.

You look at Epique with their head on your shoulder now, and you know you need to do something about it. You can’t keep yearning like this and thinking about “what if”s from the past. 

FLOOSH:: Hey Epique? 😳  
FLOOSH: You know you’re my best friend, right? 😳  
FLOOSH: Like… I dunno what i’d do without you now. 😳

Your voice is soft and nervous. Epique stops looking at the TV and stops leaning against you, instead sitting and facing you directly with a smile on their face and a curious look in their eyes. 

EPIQUE: we11 yea#!  
EPIQUE: t#e fee1ing is one #undred percent mutua1  
EPIQUE: your my best bro

You already knew that, but the reassurance still makes your face warm. Sometimes you just needed to be reminded of these things for them to really sink in. 

Epique keeps going, which you didn’t expect. You’re left to listen to every word he says with a yearning eagerness that isn’t new to you but right now is much worse than usual. 

EPIQUE: i just t#ink  
EPIQUE: u#  
EPIQUE: your great  
EPIQUE: being your friend is a #uge win  
EPIQUE: yknow?  
EPIQUE: ...1ike a boss

He shrugs and smiles sheepishly, running a hand through his hair. You smile back at him brightly and let yourself relax. This is Epique you’re talking about, you don’t know why you’d think they’d get upset with you.

You take a moment to breathe and think about what to say next. You have a lot of feelings, and they’re hard to put into words, but you have to get it out somehow. She deserves to know these things. 

FLOOSH: I’m…  
FLOOSH: I’m glad we’re friends. 😳  
FLOOSH: You’re too cool for me sometimes I think. Ha. 😳  
FLOOSH: Ahaha....

You cough into your fist as you chuckle awkwardly. Epique doesn’t seem bothered and you take note of the light green flush on her face.

EPIQUE: rea11y?  
FLOOSH: Yeah? 😳  
FLOOSH: You’re friendly and funny and charming and you win at everything. 😳  
FLOOSH: And you’re nice looking on top of that. 😳  
FLOOSH: Everyone likes you. 😳

You pause and look down at your hands. You can’t think of anyone that really dislikes Epique, while you’re well aware of the many trolls that are bothered by your existence. You try to be a better troll than you were before, but it isn’t enough for everyone and you have to accept that. There’s still the part of you that desperately wants everyone to like you-

Epique’s hand reaches out and takes yours, and your entire self deprecating train of thought stops. Their hand is warm and soft and you look up to see them blushing as they talk to you. You hadn’t noticed until now that they moved closer, but now you can see their eyes faintly behind his square sunglasses. You don’t stop looking at his eyes.

EPIQUE: f1oos# you are awesome  
EPIQUE: i mean it  
EPIQUE: i 1ove #ow we #ave fun toget#er  
EPIQUE: and um  
EPIQUE: i t#ink your nice 1ooking too  
EPIQUE: your beautifu1 actua11y  
EPIQUE: ...1ike a boss

Some part of you lights up at being called that and you don’t know why. You can’t find it in yourself to protest. Epique must have noticed, because she holds your hands a little tighter and smiles a little more. You’re both in a weird state of being relaxed, yet also so tense you feel like anything could happen to finally make you break.

FLOOSH: oh.😳  
FLOOSH: thank you. 😳  
FLOOSH: i uh 😳  
FLOOSH: ahaha 😳  
FLOOSH: wow 😳

You’re dumb smiling still and simultaneously want to run away and hide from this, and get even closer to Epique. You stumble over your words and all you can really do is be happy over what they said to you. Epique looks flustered but you don’t think they mind too much.

It’s the eighth time you’ve wanted to kiss them, and after everything you’ve been through, you don’t want to wait any longer.

FLOOSH: can i ask you something as a bro and a friend? 😳  
EPIQUE: yea#  
FLOOSH: …  
FLOOSH: what if we kissed? 😳  
FLOOSH: um 😳  
FLOOSH: as friends 😳  
FLOOSH: ...unless…? 😳

You wish you said that more smoothly, but you’re trying. Epique’s grip on your hand gets loose as she processes what you said. You hope you didn’t do something wrong.

EPIQUE: o#  
EPIQUE: #a  
EPIQUE: wow you rea11y...  
FLOOSH: sorry-  
EPIQUE: no no no its c#i11  
EPIQUE: i wou1d u#  
EPIQUE: 1ike t#at a 1ot f1oos#  
EPIQUE: it sounds swag  
EPIQUE: ...1ike a boss

Epique has that look you get on your face when you’re trying really, really hard not to smile. He’s failing though and you can’t help but melt from the lovestruck look he has. He locks eyes with you and the two of you are silent as you think about the agreement you just made. You’re trying to concentrate on the feeling of his hand still on yours. It means you notice right away when she moves her hand away and hesitantly rests it on your cheek.

It feels right like this. You lean into her touch and let yourself laugh gently. You haven’t even done anything yet but you feel so happy like this. You feel safe and comfortable enough to put your hand on the back of Epique’s head and let your fingers be tangled up in their hair. When you’re with Epique, you’re at home.

The first time you kiss Epique is everything you’ve hoped for and more. 

You pull them closer to yourself and your lips meet, and it’s perfect. Their mouth is soft and you can feel their smile against yours. Your face burns and you don’t care enough to be embarrassed about turning such a bright shade of teal because you’re sure even with your eyes closed that Epique’s face is bright green too. There’s a sense of relief that washes over you and you’re very calm even as your heart beats so fast you think you might end up fainting.

You aren’t sure how long the kiss lasts, because no matter how long it was it wouldn’t have been enough. You pull away from Epique and open your eyes, and the two of you take a moment to breathe and avert your gazes like embarrassed wigglers. 

FLOOSH: that was nice. 😳  
EPIQUE: pretty awesomesauce  
EPIQUE: i  
EPIQUE: wow  
FLOOSH: yeah. 😳

It’s overwhelming in a good kind of way. The two of you continue to not look at each other, too flustered over the bro kiss to look without breaking out into a grin. You are content with leaning against Epique though, and you think the subtle not-cuddling is what you need right now.

EPIQUE: do you want to keep p1aying t#e game?  
EPIQUE: ...1ike a boss  
FLOOSH: ...yeah. 😳  
FLOOSH: I’d like that. 😳

You kissed your best friend for the first time, and now you’ll go back to playing video games with them. There’s a kind of euphoria from it and the joy you get just from being with them makes every second spent worth it. 

Maybe if you win the game you’ll kiss them again. You’d like that.


End file.
